In Norm’s apartment:

Norm: What the heck are you doing?

Rex: Using the Force.

Norm: What force?

Rex: THE Force.

Norm: The — hah hah — Jedi Force?

Rex: Laugh, you do. Eat you, I will.

Norm: What are you attempting to use the Force to do, exactly, because it looks like you’re just sitting there on the couch with your eyes shut real tightly.

Rex: From you, silence. Concentrating, I am.

Norm: On what!? Oh, never mind. Move please, I think you’re sitting on my laptop.

Rex: Sitting on it, I am.

Norm: Then move!

Rex: Move, I will not.

Norm: You’ll crush it!

Rex: Yes. Crush it, I will. [opens eyes] Unless you pay me a hundred bucks.

Norm: No way.

Rex: [closes eyes] Then crush it, I will. A thousand pieces, into. A pressure slight, it will only take. Watch –

Norm: OKAY! I’ll give you a hundred bucks!

Rex: Here’s your laptop. And what do you know, the Force works.

Having discovered that I do in fact have the powers of the Jedi Force, and also having a hundred dollars to burn, I bought myself a snazzy new outfit for May 4th, also known as Star Wars Day.

What do you think?

We’re going to have a photo shoot on Tuesday, May 4th at noon if you want to come down here and get your picture taken with me looking all Jedi-awesome. I wonder if I can get the mayor to come down and visit me so I can get a chance to say, “Luke, I am your FAH-THER!”

I just realized though, that I don’t have a light saber and I’ve used all my money on my costume. Looks like I’m going to have to use the Force to get some more money out of Norm.

I wonder how much me NOT sitting on his car would be worth?

Rawr.